Apprehended by His Fire
Written By:
Sergio Scataglini
In May 1997, I greeted my congregation
in the city of La Plata, Argentina, and I said, "I will come back to you
in a week; I am going to see a couple of places of revival in the United
States and I will bring reports back to you of what the Lord is doing in
the world. Basically, I thought I was doing so well with the Lord, that
all I needed was another touch from Him at these places of revival to
strengthen my ministry.
However, there had been a cry, a very
strange prayer that I had been praying for the previous months. Several
times I was kneeling down and I found myself praying, "Lord if you are
not going to bring another revival, take me home, I do not want to live
anymore." And then I tried to rebuke my soul, because I have three
little kids and my wife and the ministry was not doing so bad. I
thought, "I should not pray this way, because the Lord might answer my
prayer!"
Then I realized that the Holy Spirit was
putting a burden in my heart to see revival. There was a holy hunger for
more of God. John Knox used to say, "Lord give me Scotland or I will
die." I pray that you will desire revival more than your own life, that
you will desire more than to be alive to see your entire nation shaken
under the power of God.
Like many others, I was praying for
revival but I was not preparing for it. I was going to bring reports of
revival back to my congregation. So I went to a place of revival and
rejoiced in the Lord with what I saw. I was excited and then I left the
next morning very early for northern Indiana, where my wife's family
lives.
In a Rush to Get to the Next
Meeting...
Two days later I went to greet people in
a church. I only had a few moments in the program, as they had another
guest speaker that Sunday morning. It was not my turn to preach there;
as a matter of fact I was supposed to leave very quickly that Sunday
morning, (May 18, 1997) to go to another church to preach, but I didn't
know that the Lord had other plans.
I shared a greeting, and then the pastor
said, "Let's ask Pastor Sergio to come up front and we are going to pray
for him before he goes to the other church, so he can carry fire them."
Those were his words. He called young people to pray for me.
Taken by Surprise...
They began to pray very calmly for me.
Everything was quiet and nice and according to the church bulletin. As
the young people began to pray for me, I closed my eyes; my mind was not
on revival or anything else. I was in a rush to go to the next church to
preach, when my clasped hands began to shake, without my permission, and
I could not control them. In, our denomination, and especially the
training that my father gave me, when we are on the platform, we are in
control. We let the Lord use us, but don't get out of hand. If we get
out of control, what will happen to the rest of the congregation?
That is wise. But in this case,
something was happening to me for the first time that I could not
control. I thought, "This is out of place." I opened my eyes and looked
at the congregation before me, no one else was shaking. So I tried to
stop the shaking. I gripped my hands more tightly trying to stop the
shaking, and my entire body began to shake. I remember locking my knees
and making them really stiff, and then I fell on the floor.
Something strange was happening and I
said, "This is not right, I must get up." From the floor I was shaking
completely out of control, and I was looking at the people, and they
were looking at me. No one was praying any more! The pastor began to
lead a few songs. I was weeping and the next moment I was laughing. I
felt very, very embarrassed, quite shocked, and extremely happy, all at
the same time.
I said, "I must get out of here." Three
times I tried to get up. The third time two ushers helped me up. The
associate Pastor was next to me. The pastor came down from the platform;
I was right there in front of the platform. I said crying, "Pastor, do
not let me interrupt this meeting, please take me out of here." And this
brother put his arm over my shoulder and said, "You are not
interrupting, brother, this is the presence of God." That was like a
healing balm over my soul.
You know how important it is when this
new glory of the Lord comes that there would be godly people to
understand what is going on. As we pray for the fire of God, we will
find others who have a ministry of fire fighters.
They finally carried me out. I thought
they were carrying me to a separate room. I wanted to be alone with God.
But they had the bad idea of sitting me on the front row. I continued
shaking and every few minutes I would fall onto the floor and someone
would come and pick me up and sit me back in the chair. I would refrain
myself as much as I could, but the more I tried to get uptight about it,
the stronger the waves of the Holy Spirit would come upon me. There were
surges of power over my bones and my life. His glory was there. I did
not know what to call this.
Someone, without consulting me, went
back to the church office and called the pastor of the other church that
was expecting me to preach. They said, "It does not look like this
fellow is going to make it today." It took me two weeks to get to that
church to preach!
At that point of my experience, though,
my mind was not changed, my thoughts were not renewed at that time. My
body was shaking, I had a sign, and I could feel the waves of the glory
of the Lord. The Bible speaks to us about miracles, signs and wonders. I
believe that was a sign from the Lord to catch my attention. And He
certainly did! I was available for twenty-four hours a day to Him for
the next six days.
How is a Christian permanently
transformed? By the renewing of his mind. "Do not conform any longer to
the patterns of his world, but be transformed by the renewing of your
minds." (Romans 12:2). When our thoughts are purified, and our wrong
conclusions are set aside, and the truth of the gospel comes to us, then
we are no longer the same.
Facing My In-Laws...
A brother came and asked me a question
that was a little humiliating. He said, "Brother, do you need a ride
home?" And I said, "Yes, I think I do." I only had one prayer as we were
driving to my in-law's house. I would say, as I continued to shake, cry
and laugh, "Lord, please do not let my in-laws see me like this." I was
praying that they would not be there, when I arrived. There had been
some theological tension with my in-laws. I said, "Lord, do not let this
cause any division." But the Lord did not answer that prayer.
When we opened the door to my in-laws
house, standing right there before me was my mother-in-law and my
father-in-law. I could not walk very well, so the brother who had driven
me home was sort of carrying me. I was perspired and I could not speak
clearly, but I remember saying, especially to my mother-in-law, "Mom, I
am okay, don't worry, but please do not look at me." And immediately my
mother-in-law raised her hands to heaven and began to praise and glorify
God. She entered into a three-day fast for the glory of God. As I made
my way to my room, I heard her say, to my great surprise, "This is what
we need in our churches!"
This brother began talking to them and
explain to them what had happened, so that gave me an opportunity to go
up to my room. I finally reached my room on the second floor, I closed
the door and I was so happy to be alone. I continued to shake and weep,
and I did not know what was happening. Two hours later, the sign ceased
completely, there was no more shaking, everything was fine. Then I said,
"Boy do I have things to tell my church in La Plata." I thought that was
the end of the experience.
Not a Touch, But a Transformation...
Since I was normal again, I went
downstairs to explain to my in-laws what had happened. Before I could
explain, my mother-in-law set a plate of food before me and she said,
"Isn't the Lord wonderful?" And when she said that, I could feel the
glory of the Lord coming upon me again. I fell backwards to the floor,
again, and began shaking; I began to crawl up the stairs again to my
bedroom.
I was supposed to confirm with another
pastor in the area that I would preach in his church, but I could not
even make a phone call. I was saying, "Lord, if this is yours, how come
I am not doing your work? I should be more busy than ever before." I had
on top of my desk a list of things to do, and the airplane ticket I had
bought to get there was expensive, so I felt I had to get things done. I
was looking at that list, and that list was looking at me and it was
like I wanted to get so busy for the Lord, but I did not understand that
the Lord had a different plans for me. He did not regard my agenda; He
ripped it to pieces!
For six days, I was in the presence of
almighty God, weeping and crying. When I thought I was normal, I would
put on my tie and jacket and get ready and before I would touch the
doorknob, the power of God would come upon me and throw me on the floor
so I could not get up. At times I would be there for hours before I
could get up.
The Glory Increases...
The next day, the presence of the Lord
was even more powerful than on Sunday. I began about 7 a.m. to iron my
shirt, because I wanted to do things for God. I did not finish ironing
my shirt until about 3 PM, because in between ironing the shirt, the
glory of the Lord would fill the room and I would fall on the floor and
worship Him.
John the Baptist said it so clearly in
Matthew 3:11: "I baptize you in water for repentance, but after me will
come one who is more powerful than I,. . ."
He is not equal to us, He is more
powerful. That is why He cannot fit in our old patterns. That is why we
cannot have an outpouring of His spirit on our lives and keep the same
old wineskins. We have to have a change of wineskins before the Spirit
can descend. If you are so taken with your ways and your patterns, and
the Holy Spirit comes, it will break the old wineskins. But new
wineskins are different because they stretch.
Matthew 3:11 continues, ". . .more
powerful than I whose sandals I am not fit to carry." Now this is a
promise: "He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire." So
many people say, "Oh I received the Holy Spirit fifteen years ago". I
believe that the Holy Spirit comes to our hearts when we receive Jesus.
That is the beginning. His presence is with us. We could not be
Christians without the Holy Spirit. But somehow we have managed to
divide the baptism of the Holy Spirit from the fire of the Holy Spirit.
THE FEAR OF THE LORD...
I sensed waves of the Holy Spirit over
my life those first few days, but my mind was not changed until the
third day that I was under this fire of the Lord. That day, everything
changed. I woke up and there was a sadness in my room. The same
beautiful presence of God that was loving me and hugging me the day
before, now was rejecting me and coming too strong, and dangerously
close to me.
That morning, the holiness of God was so
close and so strong in my room that I became very scared and I began to
back up. I backed up until my back touched the wall, then I thought,
"What am I doing? This is a spiritual presence of the Lord, I cannot
hide from it." And I began to say, "Lord, please no more." That was the
first time I had ever prayed that prayer. I was so scared I said, "Lord,
I don't think I can take any more, You are too holy."
So I said, "Lord what is it? I know
there is something wrong. Please have mercy on me, don't kill me here.
That afternoon I went for a walk outside of the house. The power of God
very suddenly came over me and threw me to my knees on the ground. It
was so sudden and so unpredictable that I broke down in tears
immediately. Then the Holy Spirit began to show me pictures of sin in my
life--things that had been unresolved.
I was born and raised in a Christian
home. Even as an infant, my parents used to read the Bible to me. My
parents taught me in the ways of the Lord. But now God was dealing with
what I had thought were "evangelical sins", things I had thought He
would not mind. I had accepted a lie of the devil that we will always
have a percentage of sin or evil in us; but now the Holy Spirit was
resisting me. He was not hugging me.
Time Does Not Erase Sin...
While I was there on the ground, the
Lord pointed out in my mind specific things in my life that were not
right. I thought time would erase them because they were so minor. But I
was reminded that little sin is still sin. All sin is sinful and
destructive. I saw flashes of moments when I had hardened my heart
against a brother. I could see the very place that it had happened. I
had never mistreated him, but had made a silent pledge to never get
close to him, again. I was reminded of times when my eyes had lingered
too long on images of things that were not pleasing to the Lord.
As I was there, I began to weep for my
sin, and I felt such a pain for my sin that I felt sick, as if a fever
was coming over my body. And the Holy Spirit began to speak to me and
now my mind was beginning to catch up with what the Lord was trying to
do. And God spoke to me and said, "Because you are neither cold nor hot,
I will spit you out of my mouth." I was shocked. "Lord, I have been in
the ministry for years, I am a preacher of your word, I fasted last week
and pray every day. How have I been so deceived? Why have I never seen
this before?"
98% Holiness Is Not Enough...
The Lord said to me, "I wish you would
be cold as a pagan, so I could save you again, or hot as a believer that
has given 100% to me, then I could use you in My own way." Then the Lord
answered my question about why I had not seen this before, "Deceitful is
the heart of man, and desperately wicked." I was terrified, I could not
believe that moment. Then the Lord spoke again to me and said clearly,
"98% holiness is not enough."
In a sense, I was a Pharisee of
Pharisees. I grew up in a Christian church. My goal was to be fairly
holy, to do pretty well, to pass the examination with a 70%, or a B, but
the Lord had different demands.
He rebuked me for my self-righteousness,
and exposed the lie of my heart. I then realized my greatest error: I
was not trying to be like Jesus. I was just trying to be fairly good. At
that moment I felt that all of my religiosity, all of my discipline was
like filthy rags in His presence, because I had not believed that the
Lord did not call me to be a fairly good person, but that He had called
me to be like Jesus. The week before my trip to the States, I had fasted
and prayed a lot and I felt so good about myself. I felt I must have
been 90% holy or more.
Sometimes we let apparently
insignificant sins get into our hearts. But we have to ask ourselves
this question, "With how many sins do you think the Lord will allow us
to get into heaven? What percentage of evil do you think He will allow
us to take with us when the day of the Lord comes?"
As I was in the presence of the Lord,
God spoke to me in terms that even a child could understand. At that
moment, I could not understand anything more complex than that. He told
me, "Nobody gets up in the morning and prepares a cup of coffee or tea
and puts just one drop of poison in it, then stirs and drinks it." Then
He began to speak to me about the church. There are people in the church
who do allow poison in their hearts and in their minds and it is
destroying them. No one would consider buying a bottle of mineral water
that said on its label: 98% pure mineral water, 2% sewage water. Yet
that is just what many Christians have allowed in their lives.
So many people wonder, "Why do I lose
the power of God, or the strength of the Lord so quickly? Maybe it is
because I am a failure, maybe it is because I am not trained." I will
tell you, even when there is 1% of sin in our lives, it can eventually
destroy the whole devotion in our lives.
Conviction of Sin, Not Guilt...
I wept, I confessed and I repented. The
Lord would point out to me specific sins in my life. He did not point
out to generalities. Satan has a fake ministry that he uses especially
in the church. His ministry is a ministry of bringing guilt. The Bible
tells us that Satan is the accuser of the brethren. He comes to put a
general sense of guilt. He never helps us to resolve it. Then all we do
is feel bad. There are some leaders, some workers, some servants of the
Lord that are in the ministry. Their hearts are trying their best, but
they are tortured by guilt. Before they preach they have to get rid of
that guilt for one hour, and then it comes back to them. That is not the
ministry of the Holy Spirit.
The ministry of the Holy Spirit is to
bring conviction of sin (John 16:8). He speaks very directly and
specifically, and His word is so clear to us. He will tell us what is
wrong with our hearts our thoughts, and our affections and He will
demand repentance from us and He will change us. That is the work of the
Holy Spirit. It is very different from the work of Satan. Satan comes to
destroy lives, to pull entire ministries into depression, into
loneliness. There are people who say, "I hope that nobody will know me
ever the way that I am personally." But I will tell you this, my
brother, my sister, pastor, servant of the Lord, whoever you are, when
the fire of the Holy Spirit comes upon you, you will say with Apostle
Paul, "My conscience is clean". Your life will be purified because of
Jesus."
That day I went back to my room and
gradually began to recuperate the joy of the Lord. But now instead of
landing in the same place as before, I had changed to a new address. The
joy of the Lord was in that room. I share my testimony not only just to
tell you about something that is happening on the other side of the
world, but I know the Lord wants to impart to you what He has given to
me.
More from
Sergio
Scataglini
